So today is the much talked about Solar Eclipse in Aries. That’s what I’m currently seeing; a sun crescent that’s upside down. I’m trying to be a more spiritual person and everyone is giving this eclipse a bad name. I’m hearing “don’t manifest”, “stay inside”, “chaos”.

I went outside. Because when else is the light around me going to be this awesome? It’s beautiful lighting outside, like the opposite of twilight, or soft cool light around me. I went outside to face the bright orange sun and I even met two new neighbors. Being out in the semi light feels good. I’m free.

And now I’m in my car vibing listening to Hobi’s great new album: Hope on the Street. His album is totally great and it’s definitely more “comfortable” than his solo debut. His music displays a musical change and it veers away from rap, but it isn’t so strikingly different that people (me) think it’s disingenuous. It’s actually pretty real. The beats are beating.

Recently our sunshine admitted that he “pretends to enjoy” the things he should be enjoying. In a way Hobi is in his eclipse era. And I’m here for it. I kinda got retrograded too.

It’s easy to fall into chaos and depression if you aren’t vigilant. Anyway, I am thankful for this chaotic eclipse in bringing me outside to smell some fresh air. I’d literally be wallowing if it weren’t for this solar pie slice even pushing me out into the world of light and air.

Maybe the reason this eclipse feels so good to me is because I’m in chaotic resonance with it. My life “and insides” feel eclipsed too. Like one day I was performing, then I slipped, and then I let myself go into mudslide, and now all of me is in sludge-like semi darkness. It’s my mental and internal sun that’s being covered. Sooooo—- this eclipse is more of a reflection of me than it is a harbinger of demise.

It’s bringing me to light, in all my darkness.

Thanks 🌙 for freeing me, and for validating the chaos around and within me.

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Another thing. I may be misunderstanding this, but people are saying you’re not supposed to do anything new or try anything new during this time. I’ve been in a funk and I have no other option than to move. And move I did. I took a nice (first time in a long time) walk in the park. It’s sunny and warm and there were kids with bikes and people playing sports. I was outside and breathing.

This evening I de-cluttered my living space, which needs a huge turn over. I finally caught up on my birthday journal. I restarted my Hangul. Tonight I’m going to restart my completely neglected face care routine. There’s a lot of myself I’ve neglected and I can only do one small thing at a time.

So no. I am using today (despite the heavens) to begin again. This environment I am in is born of chaos and so I will chaotically ride the train until my life gets better.

Like I said, there’s either the mudslide or moving. I choose to finally move.