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Military Enlistment day. I wish I could also call it a Me day, in a positive way. It was still a Me day, except all of me was either grieving or coping. In the morning I felt like crying. I held it in long enough for it to become a headache and mild chest pain.… Read more

Hello insomnia, my old friend. I don’t know who I am anymore, when it comes to what kind of girlfriend, partner, and spouse I’ll be. I’ve certainly changed for the better— and I don’t even know how I’ll be, so that means I’m not perfect. Maybe in some convoluted way because of BTS’ enlistment I’ve… Read more

Message: to express feelings about the boundaries that separate self from fans, self from idol, self from war. Barricade: is a dividing line between two things. In the idol world, it’s the physical barrier in the first row during a concert. It separates the stage from the audience. You from ARMY. In war, it’s the… Read more

Sometimes I post things right away because I fear that if I don’t publish it and I suddenly die, what I want to say will never be said. That being said, I nearly** perfected the holy grail Korean/me skin care method. It’s a combination of the basic skin ten-step Korean skin care routine plus a… Read more

No pics for now. I just want to jot down a quick observation about feelings and feelings. When I’m heartbroken, the pain is in my diaphragm. When I’m sad, it feels like a cloud is inside me. When I’m annoyed, it’s like this tension all over my body. When I don’t get enough sleep, I… Read more

I’m just so happy. I am. At least, this is my goal for the ‘Tobers of this year! Thanksgiving is coming up and I have the whole week off. Thanks to a kind person I am also free to not worry on Black Friday. Who knows! I might even go shopping. Black Friday shopping is… Read more